I'm Sorry. What's Your Name Again?

I'm still trying to figure out how to manage my role as parent and as spouse. It seems as though I'm feeling so stretched in 5,000 different directions that something has to suffer. And God forbid I close one of my 85.4 blogs.

I'm not saying my blogs are causing problems with my marriage, persay, but I am hinting at the fact that my relationship is a bit strained.

I'm pretty sure that I'm not alone in this struggle, particularly as I lug my large baby and toddler around. Parenting is hard. So is marriage. Put the two together and it can be somewhat disastrous.

If I could do things again, I'm not sure I could have done anything much differently. My husband and I went out on dates even when we lived in Mississippi. I have no qualms about hiring a babysitter and getting out of the house. But no amount of dates can help inherent parenting differences. Or resentment. Or a really bad combination of both.

So, for me, I knew I needed a date with my husband when I realized all our conversations were arguments.

What about you? And what do you do to keep your marriage/relationship alive and kicking?

And if you'd like to win a chance at a $100 Amex Gift Card for a dinner out plus $100 cash for the babysitter thank to E-Harmony Marriage and Parentbloggers, write your own post "You Know You Need a Date with Your Partner When....". Send the link to parentbloggers@gmail.com, and make sure it's up some time today (June 1). We'll round up all the posts and pick a winner at random to be announced on Sunday. Click here for more info!

Comments

[mammaloves]

Oh boy is marriage hard! And parenting.

I think the resentment that builds is the most harmful. It's hard to be attracted to someone you resent.

[Smiling Mom]

I hear you. We are finally emerging from the haze of frustration, resentment, etc. My son is almost 3 and daughter is almost 1.5. The first year with my both children and husband was probably our worst year of marriage. I feel your pain!

[dana]

Another familiar point. Doug and I have been arguing a lot.

And about really stupid stuff like what to have for dinner. "Just thaw something, dammit!"

[Shawn]

Right on, Sista! Man, it is all very, very hard. I'm not sure if it's harder now than previous generations or if our mothers were just pretty good at pretending. Nice post. Thanks for being real. We argue too much, too.

[Damselfly]

You know, you're absolutely right. I need a date with my husband. I'm too late for the contest. But you made me realize I need a date.

[Mama K]

You are so right. The resentment is a love killer for sure. I hope you can get a date night soon!

My entry is up here
http://mamaknj.blogspot.com/2007/06/you-know-you-need-date.html

[Deanna]

I hear ya!! Lots of "bickering", about stupid stuff for us. Resentments, things left unsaid at times, and I second what someone else posted about our mothers being good pretenders. We modern ladies have a voice like no other and it's not always a good thing.

Our 6th year of marriage but the first year with our child was the WORST year of our marriage by far. I thought we'd never get through it. It's so hard doing it all and keeping it all together!

[Liz]

Oh yeah it is tough, and i knew it was hard. Our conversations were short and more like arguments... and I am now in the process of becoming a stastic. we have an 8 month old and i found out that my husband has been having an affair for 5 months. ouch! i just wish someone could have prepared him :-( and me!