I write quite candidly about my marital difficulties, and I garner a variety of responses ranging from empathy to sympathy to even downright interventions.
Stop complaining and do something about it!
And quite frankly, something needs to be done. And for me, initially, it's the talking about it and the airing out of my grievances that gives me some sense of what is going on.
Or really, what's not going on between us.
I've had many conversations with mothers who freely discuss the difficulties their marriages have endured since having kids. And really, until you've had kids, the idea that things could change so drastically is barely comprehensible.
But bringing another life into a relationship causes havoc -- it just depends on how you cope. The difficulty with motherhood is that nothing really prepares you for what's in store. Labor is nothing compared to all the changes -- job, career, body, emotions, hormones, time, energy, sleep, sex drive. The list goes on.
And really, how do you prepare for that but to rely on your coping skills and your ability to work together and have empathy for your partner?
I've seen my marriage ship almost sink several times over these last three years, and I'm not saying it never will, nor am I saying that I don't have a part in it. But I will say that I am willing, challenging as it may be, to stick with it -- counseling, you name it -- because part of me has faith that it's going to work out.
Or maybe it's that it HAS to work out.
How about you?