Here Comes Santa Claus... Or Not

I try to take my mother-in-law's tidbits of parenting and other life wisdom with a grain of salt.

If that.

You know, dry dusting swiffers contain chemicals that will ruin your amazingly gorgeous 32 year old linoleum kitchen floor.

Or, sometimes (like after a miscarriage or two that she never acknowledged happened. ever) you have to pick yourself off the ground and just get back on the horse or her son, I guess in this case...

BUT, her whole thing about how to break it to kids about Santa almost made me want to wring her neck. Sure, complain about how it's a shame when parents don't let their kids believe in Santa because he's a lie.

I'm one to think that believing in Santa can be fun and light hearted and doesn't need to be this whole crazy production.

But then, she says "well, it's good for them to figure out that it's not true at some point because that's how life is."

EH.

I mean, can't you just transition kids from believing in santa to believing in the spirit of Santa and giving instead of saying "well, we lied to you for the first few years of your life but that's how life is so just get over it kid."

Way to establish trust in your child.

And let's be honest. I never would have cleaned my room NOR would my daughter have tried the potty without Santa.

Is that wrong?

What do you think of the whole Santa Claus thing?

--

We're talking about religion tonight. Make sure to join in -- we've got a cast full of great mom bloggers on to discuss raising your children with or without religion. 9-11pm EST. It's free!

Comments

[Caren]

This is how my mom did it and I fully intend to use the same approach:

We believed in Santa until we were old enough to question it. When we asked about whether or not he was real, my mom explained to us that "Santa" is the spirit of giving. As long as we believe in Santa, then we believe in the spirit of giving. It wasn't portrayed as a lie, but rather a way to introduce gift giving and the Christmas spirit to us.

We still get gifts from Santa to this day.

[Amy]

I believed in Santa until I was 10 years old. My mother disguised her handwriting when answering my letters to Santa, and it was a blast. I even kept my knowledge to myself when my 13-year-old cousin didn't see her mom come into the room to eat the cookies and drink the milk, and I did. It's fun and harmless, and an excuse to get more presents from "Santa" as a surprise Christmas morning. We still do the Tooth Fairy, and the Easter Bunny, and until my kids figure it out on their own (which they will), we will continue. After that, they will keep the spirit of it all alive for the younger ones. Btw, "Santa" gives presents to the less fortunate, the Food Bank, and the pets, because he loves everyone. It's a good way to promote unconditional love and good will.

[Melissa]

I'm all for Santa and then the spirit of Santa. I knew at 6, but my brothers were 10 and still believing and I never ruinined it for them. Now anything else and I would have being a bratty older sister, but not Santa...some say I was being nice and maybe I was, but I also felt is was better to pretend in case he was real. I sure as hell didn't want coal.

My kids fully believe and I've used that to my advantage many times since Halloween. ;)

[Heidi]

Since I never believed in Santa Claus when I was a kid, I know that he is not what makes Christmas fun. Because of that, I plan not to portray Santa Claus as real, but just as a really fun story.
I find that it's much harder to not do Santa than to do it. People think I'm a scrooge, which is really not the case.

[Damselfly]

I haven't discussed it with my husband yet -- does that matter? ;) -- but I'd like to see my little one grow up with the *tradition* of Santa without *believing* in Santa. Kind of like we do as adults. For example, we give one another gifts from "Santa," but we know he doesn't exist today. If I could help my baby grow up with the idea of the tradition of Santa (who is based on a real person or real people) without believing he comes down everyone's chimney and delivers gifts all over the world in one night, then that's what I'd like to do. But we'll see how it actually pans out!

[Awesome Mom]

I am with Damselfly. I think we will do the tradition but not the actual man himself. I am still really trying to decide how to even introduce him. We have taken them to see Santa but we don't talk about him bringing presents or anything. I am too conflicted about this silly thing.

[Izzy]

Believing in Santa never made me distrust my parents. I suppose someone somewhere might be scarred for life by it but it wasn't a big deal for me. If anything, I felt bad for my folks when I figured it out and honestly, I find it hard to imagine that someone would have negative associations with a mythical man who brings children new toys every year. Well, unless you never GOT any new toys, in which case I would understand having issues with Santa Claus.

I plan on using an approach much like Caren with my own kids.

[Michelle Morriss]

I grew up believing in santa and so have my children. My 14 year old daughter told me just yesterday (she has 2 younger brothers) that she wishes she had never stopped believing in the jolly old red man.. because its not so much fun now that she knows how the gifts get under the tree. I must say I agree. Santa still comes for all who beilive in the spirit of giving. I even get santa gifts at my parents home. Its a nice "carefree" time. We have all made it with no hard feelings towards my parents nor my daughter towards us. Happy Holidays everyone!